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/var/www/vhosts/pegasus.ouvaton.org/httpdocs/ecrire/inc_version.php3 on line 531 Warning: Illegal string offset 'statut' in /var/www/vhosts/pegasus.ouvaton.org/httpdocs/ecrire/inc_db_mysql.php3 on line 26 C'est arrivé chez vous ! La Maison des Bories

C’est arrivé chez vous !

Le mercredi 10 septembre 2003.

Les chroniques racontent qu’en 1994 aurait eu lieu un Challenge d’aviron entre l’équipe de rameurs de « VOTRE ENTREPRISE » et ceux de l’équipe Lambda. Dès le départ, les rameurs "lambda" brillèrent d’efficacité et arrivèrent avec une longueur d’avance sur l’équipe de « Votre Entreprise »...

De retour dans les locaux de « VOTRE ENTREPRISE », le Codir - Comité de direction se réunit pour analyser les raisons d’un résultat si imprévu et déconcertant ; leurs constatations furent les suivantes :

La décision fut portée à la Sphère de Planification Stratégique pour l’année suivante, avec une réforme dont les répercussions se feraient sentir à tous les niveaux de la Hiérarchie. En 1995, lors du départ du nouveau Challenge, l’équipe lambda reprenait une fulgurante avance et termina même avec deux longueurs d’avance !

Une nouvelle analyse du CSC - Comité Stratégique de Consultation (oui il avait été renommé entre temps..) rendait les constatations suivantes :

La conclusion du Comité fut unanime et sans surprise : "Ce rameur est un bon à rien".

En 1996 se présentait pour l’Equipe de « Votre Entreprise » une nouvelle opportunité ; En effet, la Direction du Haut Management de « VOTRE ENTREPRISE », en collaboration avec la Direction de Recherche sur les Ressources Humaines avaient mis au point une "Stratégie Novatrice" qui améliorerait sans aucun doute possible le rendement et la productivité, tout en diminuant le coût et le délai, grâce à l’introduction de modifications substancielles dans la Hiérarchie.. C’était la clef de voûte du succès, l’aboutissement ultime d’une méthodologie qui ferait pâlir d’envie les meilleurs Managers du Monde...

Le résultat fut.. catastrophique. L’équipe lambda arriva avec dix longueurs d’avance !!! Le Haut Comité Stratégique de Consultation (oui le nom avait été changé entre temps), rendit une fois de plus ses constatations :

Après plusieurs jours d’épuisantes réunions et autant de séances de Brainstorming, le Comité décidait de punir le rameur en lui supprimant son augmentation et en l’évinçant de l’équipe de « Votre Entreprise » dont la Grandeur et la Réputation risquait de se voir ternie par une telle incompétence. Lors de la réunion de clôture, le Comité, appuyé par la Direction du Haut Management, rendait son verdict :

"Pour le prochain Challenge, nous engagerons un nouveau rameur, mais par le biais d’un contrat d’Outsourcing de manière à faire respecter les objectifs. La fabrication du bateau, quant à elle, sera entièrement sous-traitée chez un fournisseur par le biais d’un contrat avec une close d’obligation de résultats. La formation Avant Gardiste ne sera pas remise en cause, des mois de réflexion ayant prouvé sa capacité théorique à augmenter le rendement"



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